Let me tell you about me and sex.
We are not talking about love, ladies and gentlemen. We are talking about sex. There's a difference, just in case you didn't know; and if you didn't, I don't blame you. It's the media's best kept secret.
But back to me:
I was exposed to sex at a very young age. Like most of us, it was introduced to me through perversion; namely through molestation. I want to make it clear that sexual perversion would be anything sexual or lewd that disregards its sacredness or connection to God and his law. So, yes, most of us were introduced to sex through some type of perversion, especially if it was on television. It is sexual immorality from which the bible tells us to flee in 1 Corinthians 6:18. (See Hebrew 13:4, Leviticus 20:13-18, Romans 1 for more information). That's certainly not all the scriptures regarding it, but, this is an opportunity to study to show yourself approved. If you are not interested in the walk of Jesus, you will not be interested in any of those scriptures (LOL), but lets go back to me for a second. Since that time in my life, multiple experiences of sexual contact at such a young age, I have dealt with it to an unreal extent --being that it only started while I was 8 or 9 years old.
Let me tell you, you THINK not having sex is no big deal until you ABSTAIN. You think the people who are abstinent, or saving themselves, are built differently because they abstain from sex, but
for many, if not most, its the Holy Spirit who effects that discipline. I can promise you, you hear about them saying "no" to their partners and you see them get uncomfortable during sex scenes, but that's because there's a BATTLE in effect that many Christians just don't talk about. Personally, I'm not one to say much about it because I feel like my sex life (or the lack thereof) is nobody's business, but please,
PLEASE know whats real. You don't have to agree or respect the battle of abstinence, but you have to know that you will get ex'd out of a person's life for jeopardizing it. That's how serious it is for a person who has experienced sex and has chosen to offer their bodies, quite literally, a living sacrifice.
Do you wonder how/why they do it?
Let me tell you: I almost 23 years old. I am fertile as fertile can be. My body is made for reproduction and, just by that token alone, it is ready for sex. While my body, and your body, may be ready for sex, we have to recognize that we, ourselves, are not. Let's not even talk about premarital sex because even if we manage to wait until a guy puts a ring on it (or for the fellas: until a girl lets you have her number to begin with, to allow you to put a ring on it), it is still a matter of unrooted desire. The initial sex drive is not learned, it is innate.
I'll give you my personal experience and then I'll give you scripture to broaden the point. For me, it had to stop being about "trying to stay holy", "trying not to look at nasty scenes", "trying not to listen to and imagine the lyrics in songs", "trying not to send 'that text'" -- I had to stop TRYING! Scripture is nothing with out the Spirit of God (2 Corinthians 3:6). I needed to connect with Him about this matter. It had to start being about
who God is, why He's worth it, what He's done for me to overcome the sin that has been whipped, engraved and bleached into my flesh. I had to sit myself in front of rebuke and convicting scripture, especially when I didn't want to. Masturbating is so easy to do, and it's a leading cause of keeping the drive for sex alive and hungry. Masturbation is self pleasing, but its not the real thing, so your flesh will keep wanting the real thing until you give it what it needs...
d e a t h.
Just a tidbit on masturbation: Many use the passage Genesis 38:8-10 to speak against masturbation under the charge of "wasting seed". If you notice, the offender in this passage was given specific instructions and disobeyed God by not giving his seed (or impregnating) his brother's wife. I encourage you to study the scripture for yourself and take in all of the context. This isn't to justify the misplacement of sexual pleasure, but to encourage you to get interpretation of scripture on your own, and not solely from other people.
Colossians 3:5
Put
to death, therefore, whatever belongs to your earthly nature: sexual
immorality, impurity, lust, evil desires and greed, which is
idolatry.
LADIES AND GENTLEMEN
Did you hear that?!
IDOLATRY
I'm not here to call you an idolator. I'm here to say that these things listed in scripture are idolatry and so we have to regard it as such! We can't play with it. Idolatry doesn't stop at Buddah statues and Beyonce. Some of us have condemned and would have stoned others who are guilty of worship of other things when we ourselves have worshipped our own bodies.
Scenario 1: The body cries out for a nut or relief, and you are obligated to take care of this right now or you won't be able to get anything done. For the guys, that is even more literal. So, you give it what it asks for.
Scenario 2: God says via Paul in
Romans 8:12 "Therefore, brothers and sisters, we have an
obligation--but it is
not to live according to
the flesh"
Which obligation do we honor?
You think about it and judge, righteously, your own heart. Are you an idolator of the orgasm? Do you worship the D? Are you waking up devoting your thoughts and mind to the next time you will get some? What's the last thing you watch at night? Who is the last person you talk to? For this reason, David said in
Psalms 101:3
I will set no wicked thing before my eyes: I hate the work of them that turn aside; it shall not stick to me.
David knew what was best for himself to keep his flesh in place, dead and unsatisfied.
Many will tell you, marriage is not the solution for hormones, and they're right. In marriage, sex is still there for the purpose of serving, not to be served. Sex is supposed to be mutually satisfying and just like the very nature of love, sex is purposed to bring life, glorify God, and steadfastly give your spouse a good thing. If you go into marriage thinking, for the most part, about how you will be served, is that love to begin with? Is it healthy to expect that your flesh will always be satisfied, even after kids, careers, and the periodic seasons of not seeing eye to eye? I mean, lets be real. There are no scriptures that support getting an orgasm or satisfaction by way of anything other than your spouse. Learn how to put your flesh in its place, now,
otherwise, you will be a slave to it on down to defiling your own body
with your own hands.
The bed of marriage, the only place
(figuratively) that sex is pleasing to the Lord. If you don't control it now, as you are single or married, it will lead to impurity and furthermore, fornication, adultery, and anything else is possible, too: child pornography, child molestation, bestiality, etc.
Matthew 5:28
But I say unto you, that whosoever looketh on a woman to lust after her hath committed adultery with her already in his heart.
I know it's hard out here, y'all!
But you have to do whats best for you.
Put aside the idol.
I'm not here to say whether or not you love God, because the microscope isn't on my life right now to make things fair. But one thing is certain, if you don't love God, you won't do this. 1 Corinthians 6:9 tells us that those who choose to go after these things won't see the kingdom of GOD.
Frankly, I can't make you want to see it, either.
BUT
If you do love God, allow me to encourage you:
You will live without the orgasm until your time comes. After that, redeem the time!
God, Himself, is life.
The Holy Spirit is with you and enabling you to cleave to your convictions like because your life depends on it. You will be okay.
too much love,
youdontknowmebro
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